Saturday, February 08, 2003

today its flat..

not so much flat, but everything just appears that way..
not to say that evertything isn't fine, well hey, it couldn't be better.
a new found glory.
things can never get that serious to the point of social frustration?
a means to end, always a good antidode, a better remedy.

don't know what but i keep on keeping on
she responds quite happily and everything is fine, completely above board.

which is good, but that the same time
i still climb the never ending staircase to my heart..
one step at a time
bit by bit
stop
look
open...all of that

and be ok ?.
of course
i'm always ok.

assured
oh how i have been assured !!!

Friday, February 07, 2003

you know what actually appears to 'be' on the outset, actually is
i found this out last night so i confided in a friend
she found it hilarious, just stating ' the ups are the ups, the downs are the downs'

i said i have more ups than downs
thankful for that.

glad she was there.

Thursday, February 06, 2003

Whys is it always, what I want ; comes back at me
I said “ I just want to be with you “
She said “ You only want one thing “
I replied “ Remember that Chorus ?? “
‘ When I’m with you Nothing Matters ?”
“ Come Over “ she said
I couldn’t.
I’d coughed too much blood

Wednesday, February 05, 2003

Do I have the ability to make others feel alive ?

That’s what she said

I take more of a cynical approach

But that was were my head was at, way back then

She makes me feel alive

They make me feel alive

Together we can just live.

Monday, February 03, 2003

Proberly Not

We sang, we drank
We Stared into each other eyes
Why am I feeling comfortable again ?
Am I meant to ?
How long will this last
Just tonight or forever
Does she want me
Does she want to be with me
Proberly not, what do I care
Does she care for me
Maybe ; proberly not
Does she know the song is for her
Proberly not
I remember times when, we would talk
About things that affected us and mattered
So much has happened in this time apart
I feel somewhat new, somewhat fresh
To feel and love again
But she does not love me
I am not special
I do not matter
Its daunting, scary for her
She wants to be alone ; why ?
I will let her be alone
But eventually I will crave again
And revel in my fantasies
For that is all I have
To hold onto
For the time being
Right now
This week
This time
That Place
Proberly not…….

Sunday, February 02, 2003

The day was long
But as the day became night her eyes sparkled

yes, i found my soulmate
unfortunately as things usually work out

the colour of the Irish dawned upon me
its the other way around

for how much longer, i will never know
hopefully not too long

u feel like you are living
with only one arm..

true.