Thursday, November 21, 2002

SHORT and LONG-TERM PAIN

I was just talking about it to a friend. I won't go TOO much into it, but every now and then I experience it. Like In the short-term I just want to do impulsive things in regards to a certain person; and if I do it at the time I get this instant gratitude and motivative burst that lasts about five minutes. But I'm finding if i just RESIST - in the Long-term, that short-term pain doesn't feel so bad, actually I feel fucking terrific !

I'll shut the fuck up now..

Wednesday, November 20, 2002

i am null, void....worthless
its seems like i am waiting for something
whatever that is....
its too quiet, everything back to normality
trying to cope, daily with everything
hope in the fact that eventually; It will all seem surreal

Tuesday, November 19, 2002

The Truth - How well do you know it ?

Monday, November 18, 2002

Avoidance. Is it necessary?... Should I avoid certain things because it makes me feel better?. I just see it as running away, avoiding an issue. I think I have to be strong. Be better than that.

But then again, I need some more sleep.

Sunday, November 17, 2002

I always do things against the grain

against the norm....

sometimes you just gotta go with that momentary lapse of sanity....

couldn't do it all the time though..